So I was talking with my buddy Andy about the bathroom post from a few days ago and I remembered a couple of other stories that I thought were pretty funny. If you do not want to hear any poo jokes, Skip the next couple of paragraphs.
So a few months ago, I was coming through Alabama on my way back home from a business trip a few months ago and I had eaten some Mexican food that was not agreeing with me. So, I feel like death and I am literally in the middle of nowhere and about to have a serious problem. I find a little grocery store (kind of like Taylor's for the Armuchee population that reads this) a have to stop. I figure it will be gross, but I gotta go. So I do the awkward poo walk into the store and ask where the bathroom is. The guy at the front points to the back around the meat/produce section. This is no joke, I walk back there and there is a toilet in a cubicle in between these two sections. The walls a so that if I was sitting there making a deposit, I could carry on a conversation with some one shopping for fresh meat and an apple without breaking eye contact. So I say, no thanks and leave.
Next place I stop is the nastiest gas station in the history of the universe. The chips on the little display in the front are covered in dust... Anyway, I make for the bathroom with the plan of doing a David Copperfield (when you levitate above the toilet so as not to be near the nasty). I open the door and there is a dude taking a leak in the sink. If there was ever a time to lock the door to the SINGLE STALL BATHROOM!!!! it would be when you decide that peeing in the toilet is not for you. Disgusted, I leave.
So now, I really feel like I am going to die. I finally find another gas station that is half way decent and stop. I go running in and the bathroom is fairly clean although it seems to be in a closet. Also, there are stairs, in the bathroom, leading to the toilet. And the toilet is on a pedestal type thingy on the top step, so if you sit down, your feet can swing wildly like you are taking a crap on a truck tail gate... Anyway, mission accomplished.
On another trip, I was in a rest stop in Iowa, and I walked up to the urinal and hanging above the row of urinals was a sign that said "Please don't go number 2 in the urinals"....
Yeah, I forgot my question, so that was kind of an underwhelming way to end this. So how about this? .... That was it... Nevermind...
3 comments:
I think I may have to take the link to your blog off my bloglist.
Have I told you that my Mom says that your blog is one of her favorites. I thought you would like to know that. She truly and honestly "gets" your sense of humor. Of all the links on my page, she always makes sure to read yours. She should have had a son....
I laughed out loud at this story. Truly entertaining stuff, Corey.
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